Meh.

Coming off anti-depressants... sucks.

I can't wait until I feel like I have a soul again, and like smiling doesn't make my face ache.

I didn't take 'em because I was depressed, I took 'em because my job makes me want to take a screaming flying leap off my building's atrium... and because last November, I stopped being to 1) sleep and 2) breathe on my way to work.

But they've killed my MoJo (and probably been the cause of my spike in weight and my killer hangovers). They've also killed my joie de vivre. Everything is like, "Okay." (Which is probably great for people where before, everything was like "AWFUL!" but I used to be Lil' Mary Sunshine...)

And so, I decided, "So long, Zoloft!"

And a week and a half into a lowered dose, all I can do is lay around and read. I don't want to hang out with people, I don't want to move, I don't want to do anything.

I just want to get off these freakin' pills and get back to my old self.

Just a couple more weeks.

I hope.

If I'm one of those people who never goes back to the way they were...

?

What then?