The Debate.

Listening to John McCain talk makes me want to do the Charleston...

to the rhythm of a telegraphic (or Marconigram) pulse.

And he makes me want to put my feet up by the pickle barrel and trade stories about early frosts having a detrimental effect on peaches that are shipped by the new Pennsylvania Railroad Cooling Cars.

That man is O.L.D.

And not like charmingly so.

Not like, "When I was a boy, we got Milk in Panama (WHERE I WAS BORN, OUTSIDE THE CONTINENTAL UNITED STATES) in a bottle, unpasteurized, with a thick head of cream on top! And women used to wear corsets and put belladonna in their eyes. And also, Thomas Edison had just invented the wax recording cylinder and Alexander Graham Bell was just perfecting the telephone. And also, MY MOTHER CHURNED BUTTER, AND NEVER LEARNED HOW TO USE THAT NEWFANGLED RADIO."

I'll bet he has no idea how to use "the e-mail."

That guy makes my dead 94 year old grandfather look spry.