An Open Memo to the Queens of Ft. Lauderdale

In Brief:

Went to Ft. Lauderdale last night to the Performing Arts Center (beautiful building, HUGE SPACE, my GOD, I've never seen a theater so big! Yes, I probably have, but not in recent memory.) to see David Sedaris.

As I am now single ::sigh:: technically I could be looking for someone else. But I'm not. And won't for a while, I don't think.

Anyhoo -- while looking around it ocurred to me: 1) I'm very picky, and 2) little details make ALL THE DIFFERENCE.

I'll expound on this post a little later, b/c I'm running out the door to go to the Tiki Bar on Isla Morada in the keys, but...

Hey, Ft. Lauderdale Queens: Here's a memo -- the whole... light-Levis jeans thing? It's been over since roughly 1997. I know... I was sad too. But I moved on. And yes, they're sort of back, but not the ones you're wearing. Not Levis 501s Button Flies. (I mean, on certain people, yes, but... not you.) Yeah. Same goes for the Stonewashed jeans. I saw some of you sporting them. You should be absolutely ashamed of yourself.

Also... Um... Maybe there aren't shoe stores in Ft. Lauderdale or something? Well... Miami isn't too far away. Bottom line: those black clunky Doc Martens with the black soles that so many of you are STILL wearing, with said Levis?

Why? Why do you do that to yourself?!

As Martha would say: It's a bad thing. Get new shoes. I'll spend more time on this post later.

But think about it.