I'm a little slow today. I just switched to Sanka. So...have a heart?

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Some Open Letters:

An Open Letter to my Reebok Stay-Put Exercise Ball:

Dear Reebok Stay-Put Exercise Ball:

1) You are difficult to inflate, and you take a lot of time to fill up with airy goodness.

2) You do not fold up for easy storage.

3) You do not match the decor of my living room.

4) I look forward to sharing many years months weeks days hours of exercising with you, until I get bored with you and stop using you like all the rest of my exercise equipment.

5) Please make me get a washboard stomach and get rid of my pothandles.

Love,

Me.

Dear Mari Winsor:

You are weird. And I think you're on drugs. Furthermore, seeing your Zombie-face in HD is frightening. Please wear a mask. I suggest an Esther mask, normally used by first and second graders during Hebrew School Purim Carnivals. Sure, it'll be scary and creepy, but much less so than your current countenance.

Love,

Me.

5 Comments:

Blogger dmbmeg said...

those exercise balls are my nemesis. between you and me, there have been a few times I have attempted to use them at the gym, only to be catapulted off the damn thing and land on my ass.

10:54 AM

 
Blogger Andy said...

I fucking love those exercise balls. They make exercising so much better. I'm not even being sarcastic. I wish I had one.

10:58 AM

 
Blogger Rootietoot said...

I refuse to cave to the fad of exercise balls. I won't. I'll stick to my 5 lb weights and stationary bike and dorky 80's video tapes.

12:33 PM

 
Blogger Yvette said...

Pothandles, Superbee? How big do lovehandles have to get before they become pothandles? What a hoot.

2:50 PM

 
Blogger Melissa said...

I HATE the stay-put ball. I shattered my ankle using this retarded fucking thing-I haven't walked a step since November. Fucking stay put my ass.

1:53 PM

 

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