I'm a little slow today. I just switched to Sanka. So...have a heart?

Monday, November 20, 2006


I have never met a Lois I didn't love. Loises are, by nature, cheerful accomodating old ladies, who smile easily, are patient and understanding, and HELPFUL.

When do I encounter Loises? Primarily when I'm on the phone with the Credit Card Companies, but I know in my youth, when I lived in cities that actually HAD little old Methodist ladies that weren't retired and were still workin', I ran into my fair share of Loises.

Loises smoke a lot. They have greyish-white short straight hair (sometimes slightly curly) nicotene-stained fingers, and a laugh that sounds like their dried out organs are rattling together - like a bag of half-empty porkrinds...

But I know when I've got a Lois, we're in business. I'll get something accomplished... and there will be a little light old-lady flirting to get something I want.

Maybe it's because Loises are whores? Who knows.

The bottom line is... in terms of old Lady names, I know I'm in business with a Lois. And follow up an old black lady when I've gotten warmed up with a Lois... watch the fireworks fly and watch me get my Credits!


Blogger Rootietoot said...

Loises aren't whores- they've just seen enough of life to know what to take seriously and what to blow off. Same with old black women...aren't they great? No bad attitude, but can Cut You with a single well placed, gentle word.

My favorite old black woman was this Lady named AnnaBeth. She was in her 80's and would quote everyone from Shakespeare (with long rrrrolling rrrr's) to Joseph Campbell. She talked about being homeschooled by her ma because "those black schools were SORRY". I miss her, but cherish my memories.

4:46 AM

Anonymous abbs said...

I think you mean Fran - not Lois

11:06 AM

Blogger SuperBee said...

No. Lois, Abbey. Lois. Fran can go either way, even though Frannie is my grandmother's name and Fran was my Nanny's name.

Lois. Lois.

And yes, RT, Loises aren't whores. I think your assessment is correct, and mine was wrong. :)

11:29 AM


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