I'm a little slow today. I just switched to Sanka. So...have a heart?

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Know what's great about tomorrow?!

Looking ahead, know what's so great about February 15th?!

SALE-PRICED CHOCOLATE!!!

Ever since I started on the South Beach Diet this time... I have turned into an even bigger girl. All I want is CHOOOOOOOOCOOOOOOLAAAATE and CUUUUUUPCAAAAAAKES and DOOOOOUUUUGHHHHNUUUTTTTTSSSS!

My Secretary had a Whitman's Sampler on her desk. You better believe I ate the shit out of that bitch. I even ate the Mary Jane flavored candy. I fucking HATE Mary Janes. (But I like their wrapper.)

I try to be good... and not overindulge, but tomorrow, I'm going to be like a Fat Guy in CVS on the Day After Valentine's Day When All The Candy Goes On Sale. (Except I'm not fat. Anymore.)

I'm not normally a big chocolate person... but for some reason this year, I must be deficient in cocoa butter or something, because all I want is chocolate. Now I know how you ladies feel all the time, tripping through life thinking about chocolate and shoes and teddy bears and lipstick. Only all I think about is Chocolate. Not shoes, teddybears and lipstick. Usually.

So.

What am I doing to be doing on the evening of Thursday, February 15, 2007, if I'm not at the Raleigh meeting more cute British Boys at Arty-Parties and getting hammered?

I'm going to be lying on my kitchen floor, with twelve ransacked boxes of sale-priced, drugstore chocolate all around me, luxuriating in the nearly post-coital chocolate-smeared release, of having consumed roughly forty thousand calories and three thousand grams of saturated fat...

Delicious.

5 Comments:

Blogger Rootietoot said...

oh, surely you have better taste than Russell Stover's. All those weird indefinable fillings that taste vaguely fruity? C'mon. Get a couple of Godiva Hazelnut Oysters.

11:58 AM

 
Blogger SuperBee said...

I didn't say Russell Stover's. I said Whitman's. There's a difference!

Yes, I like good chocolate, but when it comes down to competetive Office Chocolate gorging, I'd rather put down fifty bucks of Whitman's versus fifty bucks worth of Godiva.

Although there are definite differences in quality, if you're "In it to Win It" I think the cheaper chocolate is the way to go. It's less prone to give you that sharp chocolate-throat burn.

Hell, I'd pick a Whitman's Sampler over a box of Lindt, even.

See's and/or Harbor Sweets are a good compromise. They're not a luxury confectioner, but they're not the Chocolate of White-Bread Mongoloids, either.

I've given this subject a lot of thought. And I'm very excited for tomorrow. And the zits I'll get this weekend! WHOO!

12:15 PM

 
Blogger Rootietoot said...

well, enjoy yourself. I intend to talk SD into some Free Trade chocolate (80%, yum)at the Dekalb Farmers Market in Atlanta on Saturday.

Russell Stover's...Whitman's...you can get both at Walmart. ehn.

I guess it's age. I'd rather eat 1 perfect chocolate than a boxful of something made in a factory. There was a time, once, when I could plow through a 2 lb Russell Stover's with a glass of milk and laugh the whole time.

1:11 PM

 
Anonymous themuttprincess said...

If you can rock-n-roll thru a box of any chocolate I respect you. No matter what the kind/brand.

2:09 PM

 
Blogger dmbmeg said...

You'll be able to hear my ass getting bigger tomorrow. Listen closely!

2:12 PM

 

Post a Comment

<< Home