I'm a little slow today. I just switched to Sanka. So...have a heart?

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

A Racism Disclaimer... of sorts.

I've noticed that many of my recent posts have taken a negative tone towards the Majority of Miami. And I'm not takin' about the Jews. We're not the Majority anymore. Sadly.

I really did grow up in a place of true colorblindness and tolerance of all peoples. And, until my first year in law school, I truly was open and accepting of all peoples.

And so I have no problem placing the blame squarely on Miami-Dade County for ruining twenty years of harmonious-thought indoctrination.

I guess if you don't live down here, you can't truly understand. But let me draw you a metaphor...living in Miami, is like... being stuck on the Bumper Cars Ride at the fair, and never being able to get off. To add insult to injury, while you're in a cramped, hot space where people are constantly and unapologetically knocking into you, that "I LIKE IT LIKE THAT, YEAHHHH, BAAAAAAAAAABY, I LIKE IT LIKE THAT!" song blares constantly. Now imagine that you and your friends, let's call them... Blaire Whetherington, Tripp Everett-Wald, and Bunny Hess-Parkington, are trying to have a conversation about, oh, I don't know, wooden yachts and the benefits of a clay tennis court v. a grass tennis court, over all this racket and noise, but you're drown out by other people screaming in another language, having conversations over your four respective bumpercars, which are all huddled together, as an island of familarity in a sea of strangers. Now imagine that for three. straight. years. And add in Hurricane Panic, and you basically have an idea of what it's like living in South Florida. That's sort of how it starts to feel after a while down here. Everything is a fight, everything is an ordeal, and someone is always in your way, and laughing about it.

So, if you've noticed that I've started to cast a dim eye towards the populace of Miami, it's probably because I'm feeling a little claustrophobic right now. And maybe now's a good time to plan another trip up to New York. Or Connecticut. Or Colorado. Or anywhere else.

3 Comments:

Blogger JB said...

Oh, Superbee, you are such a keen observer of the miami-human condition. Four years from now when you leave (since I am convinced that 7 years is the limit for either non-natives or non-hispanics to live in Miami) you will miss Miami. Some of it, anyway.

9:24 PM

 
Blogger Rootietoot said...

yeah, we have the same quality of issues here, only not with Cubans, but they might as well be speaking another language. It's hard to be open minded and liberal thinking when differently-cultured people are so irritating.

5:15 AM

 
Blogger vidas said...

Just for the record, blogger.com has been sucking as of late. I've been trying to post this comment for 3 days now. Anyway, I totally agree with your assesment of the situation. Living down there is very stressful. People suck. Bottom line. They are nasty and vindictive and very very very ignorant. There is absolutely no appreciation for culture. Forget about going to a half decent museum or catching a concert that doesn't involve Madonna gyrating around a stage in her bony leathered woman suit. Culture to a Miamian is whatever that stupid fucking wannabe Talk Soup show "Deco Drive" tells it to be.

And why the hell is running errands in Miami next to impossible? Honestly, right now I live within 10 minutes of 3 malls, 2 Targets, 2 Best Buys, 4 movie theaters, 5 supermarkets and a ton of other stores. I feel like in Miami, no matter what your errand involves you still wind up in Kendall.

Fuck it. Leave the hell hole. Get out while you still can. Move back North, where your intellect and biting wit will be appreciated, rather than greeted with a "Que?".

By the by, I'm watching "Battle Royale" right now. It's one of my favorites. It's an amazing Japanese horror flick. Ridiculously good.

6:43 PM

 

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