I'm a little slow today. I just switched to Sanka. So...have a heart?

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

People I'm in love with on Television, and I hate bar preparation.

Some random thoughts -- People I want to marry on television...wanting to be a sloth (literally) I hope the next PMBR professor is hot...

1) People I'm in love with on Television: Dave Lieberman on the Food Network.

Okay people. Here is the quintessential dorky Jew I'd love to marry one day. He's cute, he's dorky, he's Jewish and he can cook. He also looks like he's about to giggle whenever he talks about anything - chocolate, butter, cranberries, whatever. I have a rather large crush on Dave Lieberman. If you know him, set me up. We can go to schul. He can make me some brisket, and advise me to stock up on butter when it's on special. I could hang out with his nerdy panoply of multi-racial friends, after going out for a "Night on the Town" drinking wine at some boring place. I'd be willing to exchange crazy livin' to marry him...or maybe I'd just up his wild quotient a little bit... Anyway. It's my goal to spend the rest of my life with Dave Lieberman. We'll have a nice loft in the Meatpacking district. I can go back to wearing dark gray turtleneck sweaters and black jackets... I miss living in the North...

2) Jeff Corwin - The Jeff Corwin Experience

Jeff Corwin is adorable and he likes animals, and talks in voices. We need to get him some new clothes, because his clothes...suck. But he's cute, he has a Norwell/Bridgewater accent, and he runs around playing with animals. I especially like when he plays with frogs and monkeys. He just littered a banana peel in the Amazon river, so he just lost one point, but whatever. He's still very cute, and I would consider marrying him too, as long as if he brought me to the Amazon, he'd get me an air-conditioned cabin on his boat, and washed his hands after he touched animals...because he could give me salmonella if he didn't. He would also not be allowed to eat any more flying roaches... That is a no-no.

Okay. I also just watched Jeff Corwin play with Sloths. They're adorable and always look like they're smiling. I would like to be a sloth. I wonder if that would be a step down in the reincarnation chain?

Lastly, Because I spend roughly seven hours a day staring at my PMBR professors, I hope the one to teach me Torts, Contracts and Criminal Law is hot. The guy we just had was really funny...I loved him for that... but he was one of those people I would just stare at, trying to find something attractive about him...and fail. So...hopefully tomorrow there will be some hottie-hotterson to keep my eyes and ears focused on him, as opposed to computer solitaire.... I had to take out my internet card. I didn't pay 100 bucks a day for this to play on the interweb.