I'm a little slow today. I just switched to Sanka. So...have a heart?

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

What a cluster of freaks.

So, my hometown has a profile on MySpace. Lemme tell ya. It's a bunch of freaks.


Go look. Wow.

Like, right? Isn't that way more than you'd think there would be?


Why a paragraph? Or even a sentence?

We're getting a new Governor. Finally, no more Bush, with his Krazy Konservative Schiavo meddling.

Instead, we have potential closet-case Charlie Crist.

I don't really know much about him, as I didn't vote for him.

Nonetheless, our new governor's batchelorhood warranted a full paragraph in today's Press Release in the Herald:

"Crist will be the first unmarried governor to take office since Republican Claude Kirk, who married six weeks later in 1967. But Crist will be just one of seven bachelors to reside in Florida's governor's office. Three of Florida's governors, Harrison Reed, Fuller Warren and Kirk, married while in office. Three others, William Dunn Moseley, Marcellus Lovejoy Stearns and Albert Waller Gilchrist were single throughout their term, although Moseley was a widower."

So much qualification! We had one in 1967...but don't worry! He got married right afterwards! We had one in (whenever) but his wife died!

Where's the qualification here?

I can already hear the low rumbling of a Bass, a Cello and a Tuba somewhere about Florida's impending Gay Governor scandal... Crist has kept his nose clean thus far...

But I'll bet it's just because blackmailing the governor is much more profitable than blackmailing the candidate...

Or is that just me being overly speculative and reading too much between the lines?

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