I'm a little slow today. I just switched to Sanka. So...have a heart?

Sunday, December 06, 2009


Well, that's done for another year. Thank goodness... I couldn't have survived another night.


1) Max Fish. Oh Wow Gallery installed a pop-up version of the famed Lower East Side bar where PS 14 used to be. It was a good time. No, it was a GREAT time.

I spent a couple (late) hours there on Thursday (which I REEEEALLLLY regretted on Friday...) ran into Miami Bro., and had to go back to redeem myself on Friday in more appropriate clothing (skinny jeans, a plaid shirt, and a ridiculous pair of old-man glasses) than the suit I wore there on Thursday night (I came straight from work!) On Friday, there was a guy there in Khaki Pants and a Banana Republic Shirt. I have never seen someone look so out of place. Bless his heart, he had no idea what he was getting into. Max Fish was a shitshow in the best sense of the word. Gang-Gang-Dance and Telepathe played, and I proceeded to sweat through numerous layers of clothing, and eat cigarettes.

I'm sorry it's closed. I almost wish they'd install a camera outside to photograph everyone who's going to try to go there next week, only to find an empty bar space...

2) Aqua. I'm divided about what I think had the best art - Aqua or Pulse. I may give the prize to Pulse, but Aqua had some great stuff. Also, it was the most manageably-scaled of the art fairs (I get bored quickly and need to see that I'm approaching the finish line, or I get daunted...) and I genuinely enjoyed the art.

3) Pulse. Pulse had fantastic art. I'm not going to try to describe it to you, because it's stupid when people are like, "Oh, and it was this blah, blah" and you have no idea what they're talking about, but... uh... I guess the moral of the story is, I think I liked Pulse the best.

4) Scope. Scope wins the prize for having the creepiest art. One was a selection of fingerpaintings made with a corpse's hand, dragged through paint and over paper. There was a video of it. It was fucking disgusting and almost made me barf in Scope. Also, scope had one of the two pieces that were shown (and somehow I saw BOTH of them...) that was made with human cremains, pressed into the cement from which the art was made. Ewwwwww.


1) Nada. Nada was eh. With the exception of my friend, David Castillo's gallery, I wasn't taken with Nada. I spent more time marveling at how dusty and crumbling the Deauville hotel is. It was also the end of the day, and I was hungover... so that may have had something to do with it.

2) PhotoMiami. What the hell is up, PhotoMiami?! Last year, it was one of my favorites. This year, it was tiny, fitting in a defunct Circuit City in Midtown, and there was nothing, but NOTHING that I would have bought if I had money. Disappointing.

3) Art Asia. Art Asia had a couple things I really enjoyed - the Hangy-Ball exhibition (I have no idea what it was actually called) and the "electric facer-izer" where you put your face in this box, and it recognized your features, and drew a cartoony-image of your face out of like... gears. If you opened your mouth it made fun noises that sounded like when Mike TeeVee gets sent over the airwaves in Willy Wonka. Otherwise Art Asia was mercifully small.

Overall, this year felt a lot more sedate than years past. I think last year was the pinnacle of Art Basel madness with free-flowing booze and revelry. This year, there wasn't as much booze (there was still a lot, though) and there was a different feeling that I can't really put my finger on.

That said, I'm glad it came. And I'm glad it went.

Until next year...