I'm a little slow today. I just switched to Sanka. So...have a heart?

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

La Fea Mas Bella

Coming soon to your T.V., Telemundo's hit, "Betty La Fea." In Spanish, it was a Telenovela about a girl, Betty, who is ugly. And no one likes her, because she's ugly and akward.

And it will be coming out soon as, "Ugly Betty," I believe on ABC. Watch for it. Just like once I was tripped out by watching "The Nanny" in Spanish, only, it wasn't Fran Drescher and Charles Shaughnessy, but... other people. And I'm not sure whether it was called "La Ninera" or something else...

But I digress. As Betty La Fea has ended, and probably been out of production for eight years, there's a NEW NOVELA OUT!

It's called "La Fea Mas Bella" or "Hideous Beauty;" its literal translation is "The Prettiest Ugly Girl."

It's about a girl; perhaps her name is Leti, I'm watching my first episode now. And from what I can tell, well. I can't tell anything.

Francisco made out with Leti in a club, and his friend kept laughing and not letting him tell the story - I caught a bit of the show last week, and he was kissing Leti in a club, and he had to do it 15 times; not because he wanted to, but for some reason he had to.

Paula Maria got fired from her job and has nowhere else to go. And she whined and whined, and all of her coworkers whined, but she still got fired, and now she has no where to go, with her little Chinese-looking Son.

And at the END OF THIS EPISODE, Leti was in the chair having her HEINOUS homo hairdresser/manicurist re-do her hair and give her a WHOLE NEW LOOK! Although, because this is a Novela, it's not going to be any different this time around.

This week, I'm more invested in the show. And let me tell you, even if you don't understand a word of Spanish (I'm getting about 90-95% of what's going on) it's GREAT to watch!

Leti is ugly and fat, with a braid and braces and zits, and thick glasses, and terrible clothes. And she's whiny and annoying. Then, the rest of the women are typical Novelabitches, with huge tits squeezed into a jacket ensemble with a mini skirt, chunky legs, and streaked blonde hair.

And they whine and jiggle, and it's just great.

All of the villains strike these evil eyebrowy poses during dramatic beats taken in conversation, and occasionally, there's a pitbul that the camera pans to during particularly hilarious moments.

It's kitchy, it's campy, it's WAY overacted and overdone, and it's as tacky as all of the Population of Miami.

I recommend, to all of you, La Fea Mas Bella. The only thing is, when you've turned off the TV, you're back in America. When I do it, and wander out the door... it's like the show never ended...